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Accountant Pick Up Lines for Income Tax Time

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You know, you can increase your charitable contributions by handing me your digits.

I’ve been auditing your body all night, and it is in damn fine standing.

In my office, 'I.R.S.' stands for 'I'm really sexy.'

You've got a lovely pair of W-2's.

You're entitled to a $5,000 tax break on your municipal bond income - now let's do it.

If I help you screw Uncle Sam, can I be next?

Please baby, let me withhold you.

Let's fill out a 1040 - you're a 10, and I'm 40.

I can show you exactly how to earn your income tax credit.

Let’s leave this place and get started on that additional child tax credit

Listen babe, being with me is so good it’s taxable.

You make my pants file for an extension.

Nice assets.



You're the kind of girl I could take home to mother, which is good, since I still live with her.

Technically, having sex with me is a charitable gift.

Baby, I could tax that ass all night long!

You know, my return this year was huge...like, huuuuge.

So do you file electronically around here often?

After filing today, I learned I have quite a strong flexible spending account. Are you flexible?

Baby if I take you home, it’ll be an experience you ain’t gonna be writing off anytime soon.

If 4+4=8, then me plus you equals fate.

You should have listed me as a deduction, because I’m dependent on your love.

It’s accrual world out there but I’m willing to invest in you.

How about we get out of here and appreciate each other’s assets.

What are you doing on Saturday night? Because I’m accounting on taking you out.

I think we should swap some liquid assets.

Are you my revenue? Because I’m so loss without you!


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